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FINDING MYSELF

FINDING MYSELF

Breathing in the cold air of North. Everywhere I looked, endless mountains, covered in snow, reflecting the bright dazzling light from the sun. But not a single soul, anywhere to be seen. The silence was almost deafening, it was actually that quite. It made me wonder, how come that this was actually the first time in the past couple months, that I finally escaped the every day rush and had time to turn off my mind. And focus on myself. I’m guessing that’s what people mean, when they say they’re going and finding themselves. But I also figured, that you can’t find yourself, until you’re fully lost.

Counting myself lucky, for the past few years I pretty much knew what I want in life.

Explore the world and expand my mind as much as possible. Grow my knowledge and learn something new every day. Make this world a better place, as much as an individual can do, right… I see every day as a new opportunity to go somewhere new and learn something different. I’m not waking up one day and realizing how much I’ve missed. Looking back to younger years and regretting not taking more chances and doing stupid decisions or ‘pointless trips’. That is not going to me.

There’s something weird about traveling. The second I leave, feels like I have a different mindset. Everything I see, it’s different and even the meaningless things can turn into crazy stories. After all, it isn’t the destination that I’m looking for, but it’s the journey. And on that journey, I learnt that I don’t have to feel safe all the time and let go of the need that I have to look or act in a certain way, none of that matters. I learnt how to see things in a different perspective. It’s like I’m driven by this completely random part of my heart that seeks for the adventure and it’s hungry for the adrenaline. It’s making me do certain things and accept decisions, not necessarily smart or save.

But for sure, they feel right.

And it made me wonder, why can’t life itself be like this? Like a big trip. Why can’t I constantly be in the mind set of a worry free person, cruising around the globe. Focusing on one day at the time. And living it, like there’s no tomorrow.

That’s the moment when I feel my complete self and I don’t need to get lost to find that piece of me. Because I know, that is pretty much been there for a long time now.

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